????60歲的彼得?施維澤是紐約市人道猶太教城市教會(huì)（The City Congregation for Humanistic Judaism）的教士。他在大學(xué)的時(shí)候?qū)Κq太研究產(chǎn)生了興趣,，于是決定在改革運(yùn)動(dòng)中成為一名猶太教教士,，盡管他從未考慮過(guò)自己對(duì)上帝的信仰。但后來(lái),，作為一名主持葬禮的年輕教士,，經(jīng)常要背誦第23章圣歌，他發(fā)現(xiàn)自己再也忍受不了讓哀悼者們從上帝那里尋找慰藉,。因?yàn)樗J(rèn)為在那樣的時(shí)刻,，這些根本不能給人們帶來(lái)慰藉。

????施維澤回憶道：“我們心中有痛苦,。我們需要哀悼,。我們現(xiàn)在很難受。這是一場(chǎng)悲劇,。這樣的生活太虛偽,，我已經(jīng)不是我自己了。于是我說(shuō)：‘我必須誠(chéng)實(shí),；我不能再干這種事了,。’我必須找到一條新的道路,?！?/p>

????他在一家出版社工作了一段時(shí)間，后來(lái)又成為一名社會(huì)工作者,，終于他有機(jī)會(huì)接觸到人道猶太教。這個(gè)教派接受各種不同的信仰,，重視誠(chéng)實(shí),。于是他在現(xiàn)在的這個(gè)教會(huì)自愿擔(dān)任教士，隨著教會(huì)的規(guī)模越來(lái)越大,，他也得到了一份帶薪的職位,。施維澤表示,，由于自己曾經(jīng)的經(jīng)歷，他感覺(jué)對(duì)于那些質(zhì)疑自己信仰的會(huì)眾來(lái)說(shuō),，他是一位更富有同情心,、更有效的教士。

????他說(shuō)：“我是一位無(wú)神論者,，這一點(diǎn)我不想隱瞞,。重要的并不是我們不信什么，而是我們相信什么……我相信人類有面對(duì)各種事情的能力,。我相信人類的適應(yīng)能力,。我相信幽默、勇氣,、思考,。我相信社區(qū)的力量。這些非常強(qiáng)大,，甚至超越了許多東西,。”????

????而對(duì)于卡洛斯?格林,，皮鞋里潮濕的硬紙板預(yù)示著他的生活跌入了低谷,，于是他和妻子做出了重大改變，來(lái)減少開(kāi)支,，償還債務(wù),，避免申請(qǐng)破產(chǎn)。他們賣掉了帶精裝修地下室,、共有五間臥室的夢(mèng)幻家園,，搬到一棟很小的兩居室內(nèi)。兩個(gè)兒子共用一個(gè)房間,，愛(ài)犬隨便找地方睡,。他們節(jié)衣縮食，用了三年時(shí)間,，終于還清了信用卡的債務(wù),。格林夫婦發(fā)誓，再也不要重蹈覆轍,。他們?cè)俅伟峒业臅r(shí)候,，買了一棟在自己承受范圍之內(nèi)的房子。而且,，他開(kāi)始參加公司提供的免費(fèi)研討會(huì)和培訓(xùn)機(jī)會(huì),，提高自己的預(yù)算與個(gè)人理財(cái)能力。

????十多年后,，格林表示,，他感覺(jué)當(dāng)時(shí)的經(jīng)歷對(duì)他的金融服務(wù)職業(yè)提供了幫助,。他說(shuō)：“我把客戶當(dāng)作真正的人來(lái)看待。對(duì)于他們的經(jīng)歷,，我更能感同身受,。這讓我有更好的視角來(lái)提出水平更高的問(wèn)題，確?？蛻魹橥诵萆钪贫煽康膬?chǔ)蓄規(guī)劃,。”

????實(shí)際上,，達(dá)特納表示,，在評(píng)估一個(gè)言行不一的職業(yè)人士時(shí)，應(yīng)該問(wèn)一個(gè)關(guān)鍵的問(wèn)題,，即他是偶爾出現(xiàn)了一兩次疏忽,，還是他始終在違反自己倡導(dǎo)其他人堅(jiān)持的規(guī)則——而且沒(méi)有任何改進(jìn)的跡象。如果是后者,，這樣的人非常虛偽,，自然應(yīng)該敬而遠(yuǎn)之。但如果是前者,，他們或許有更多的見(jiàn)解和智慧,。畢竟，如果一名飲食專家從來(lái)沒(méi)有為堅(jiān)持一個(gè)飲食計(jì)劃而努力過(guò),，你會(huì)相信他的減肥建議嗎,？

????達(dá)特納說(shuō)：“我寧愿相信親自經(jīng)歷過(guò)同樣問(wèn)題的人；這會(huì)讓他們更加可信,?！保ㄘ?cái)富中文網(wǎng)）

????譯者：劉進(jìn)龍/汪皓??

????Peter Schweitzer, 60, rabbi of The City Congregation for Humanistic Judaism in New York City, grew interested in Judaic studies in college and decided to become a rabbi in the Reform movement, despite the fact that he had never really given his beliefs in God much consideration. But later, as a young rabbi officiating at funerals, where the 23rd Psalm was standard fare, he found he could no longer bear to tell mourners to find comfort in a God that was anything but caring in those moments.

????"There is pain. We do need to moan. We are upset right now. This is a tragedy," Schweitzer recalls. "It was getting too hypocritical for me to be me. I said, 'I have to be honest; I can't do this any more.' I have to find a new path."

????He worked in publishing for a while and became a social worker before finding his way to Humanistic Judaism, in which many different beliefs are accepted and a premium is put on honesty. He volunteered as a rabbi in his current congregation before it grew large enough to offer him a paid position. Schweitzer says he feels he's a more compassionate and effective rabbi to members of his congregation who question their beliefs because of the path he took.

????"I'm clearly an atheist. I don't wave it around," he says. "It's not what we don't believe, it's what we do believe that matters ... I believe in human ability to face things. I believe in resilience. I believe in humor, courage, thinking. I believe in the strength of community. It's very, very powerful and it transcends lots of things."?

????As for Carlos Greene, after hitting bottom with soggy cardboard in his shoes, he and his wife overhauled their lives to reduce expenses, pay down their debt, and avoid filing for bankruptcy. They sold their five-bedroom dream home with a finished basement and moved into a small two-bedroom townhouse where their two sons shared a room and the dog slept wherever she could. It took nearly three years of scrimping and saving to pay down the credit cards, and both Greenes vowed never to fall back into that hole. The next time they moved, they spent less on a house than they could afford. And he began taking the free seminars and educational opportunities that his firm provided, to improve his budgeting and personal finance skills.

????More than a decade later, Greene says he feels that the experience has helped him in his work as a financial services professional. "I see our clients and our customers as real people. I have a lot more compassion for where they are," he says. "It gives me greater perspective on asking the next-level questions to make sure they're in a good space to truly be able to save for retirement."

????Indeed, Dattner says that when evaluating a professional who doesn't practice what he preaches, the key question is to ask whether he slips up once or twice, or if he perennially violates the rules he says you must follow -- with no sign of reforming. The latter individual is a hypocrite who should be avoided, but the former might actually have more insight and wisdom to offer. After all, would you want a dietician telling you how to lose weight if that person had never struggled to stick to an eating plan?

????"I'd rather have somebody who has the issue themselves; that makes them much more credible," Dattner says.????????????